Okay, after my last post, you might be asking, how do we give kids power and autonomy? Honestly, a different way to ask this same question might be, how do we protect their right to their own power and autonomy? Because in the absence of adult interference, kids will find the ways that they want … Read more
There’s a quote that I’ve seen on the internet that goes like this. “Sometimes people use ‘respect’ to mean ‘treating someone like a person’, and sometimes they use ‘respect’ to mean ‘treating someone like an authority’. So sometimes people who are used to being treated like an authority say, ‘If you won’t respect me, I … Read more
A couple of weeks ago my son, who’s 5, needed to have dental work done for the first time in his life. It wasn’t extensive and there wasn’t any drilling, but just the process of having to go to a scary place and have someone put their hands and tools in his mouth was hard … Read more
On my Facebook page, I asked adults to share something that their child had been doing that was frustrating or upsetting to them. I then invited people in the comments (myself included) to respond, from the perspective of the child…what the child might be thinking or learning or trying or not-trying and how it’s getting … Read more
Here’s a quick little thought/frustration of mine: Please, please, let kindergarteners (and first graders) (and I’d even say second graders!) use half-pencils instead of full pencils. I say “let” because I keep having to write it into IEPs as an accommodation. I wish it was just the normal! Children’s hands are 4-5 inches in circumference. … Read more
A story of mediating conflict between young siblings, rather than solving it for them. My then-2yo “Summer” was lying on the ground in the middle of the living room floor, playing with toys underneath her blanket like a tent. My then-4yo “Apollo” was driving toy cars around. I was in the kitchen, which is adjacent … Read more
In January, in my therapy gym, we decided to have a glow stick party. Technically there was no “reason” for this other than that it was fun and changed up the pace a little bit, but there is also clinically an argument to be made for lots of things that the kids experienced via the … Read more
Before a child is ever able to write, and before they learn to control the small muscles of their hands, they need to have full-body strength. This comes mainly in the form of strength in their core and trunk — where you might call your abs, your back muscles, etc — and strength in their … Read more
“My child won’t play without being destructive. He is extremely smart, but he bounces off the walls and is destructive. We try redirecting him. We try positive reinforcement. We try using incentives. We use time-outs. We’ve tried everything,” a parent asked me recently. First off — this is a great example of how using precision … Read more
Two people have asked me questions about reward charts in the last week or so, so that seemed like a reasonable question to answer next. The reason for both of them asking it was because I put “reward charts” — i.e., you do x, you get a sticker on your chart (and often when you … Read more