Remember when I brought you such stunning insights of my own mind as “Hey, when socks feel bad on my feet, I give myself permission to take them off”? 😁
Well, I’m back with another one, and this one sounds like–
Hey, if I can’t bring myself to do all 50 subcomponents of some chore or self-care or necessity, it might still be better to do 1 or 2 of them than to give up and do 0 of them.
Executive functioning, breaking down large tasks into smaller tasks, being able to plan how much time those tasks will take, self-care, housekeeping, chores…all of these things are big and ongoing and can be haarrrrdddddddd.
My kids keep tracking sand into the front room of the house, which has a wood floor. I just walked through the front room and got bothered by the sand getting on my feet. Many days, I put on socks so I don’t feel the sand. (Which is a decent coping mechanism in the short-term so I don’t get sensory overwhelmed by sensations I can’t tolerate–but I digress…)
Today, I thought to myself, in this order:
I have energy and momentum right now. I could sweep up the sand.
No, in order to sweep up the sand I will need to pick up all the shoes and the coats that are lying by the front door to sweep under there, and shake out the mats outside, and then sweep under the mats, and pick up the toys on the floor to sweep under them…and while I’m at it, I should probably empty the front room trash can.
Nevermind. I don’t have that much energy and momentum. I’m too tired and I need dinner. I just won’t do it.
UGH, but there is still sand on my feet!!!
…Wait, why don’t I just sweep up the sand. Like. I’m standing in a pile of sand. Why don’t I just sweep up this pile right here? Why do I have to sweep the entire front room and clean all of it?
I’m not going to clean all of it, I don’t have that in me right now. But rather than just give up entirely, I will sweep up this sand.
And then I went and got the broom and swept up the square footage of floor that was accessible without having to clean up the toys and the shoes and the coats and the mats…and the room isn’t 100% clean, but I sure did sweep up a lot of sand.
I give you permission, if you need it, to only do the part that’s bothering you or only do the part that you have energy for or only do the part that you know how to do by yourself or only do it imperfectly today.