We have been through some wild things as a family in our lives, but none of them have strained us as thoroughly as these past few weeks. They’ve been the hardest for our family’s well-being, the most difficult to parent, and the worst my mental health has been in a long time. I’ve been struggling … Read more
(Content warning: This post contains discussion of physical child abuse.) *** When I was nine or so, my family went on a road trip. I read all the books I’d brought with me. Bored, I picked up some parenting books someone else had brought, and read them too. I read about the best way to … Read more
Ten things I could’ve done when my kid didn’t want to brush her teeth… Nonverbal cue: Set the toothbrush down next to my kid. Toothpaste already loaded. Wordlessly. Offer alternatives: Mouthwash, floss, a different flavor of toothpaste… Playful: Announce that I see something silly in my kid’s mouth, and how I need to get it … Read more
One skill that has been really helping me in these past few weeks has been the skill of being able to describe to myself in my head, in detail, what feels bodily wrong when things feel wrong. This is a relatively new skill for me. For the majority of my life, if I felt bad, … Read more
I love the movie Strange World. It’s charming, compelling, visually gorgeous, and doesn’t get enough hype. It was my kids’ favorite for awhile like a year ago, but we hadn’t watched it since. I put it on while I needed to keep them in one place with me for awhile but couldn’t move much after … Read more
We have been using the park after school as a good strategy for getting/staying regulated. Just going and camping out with a meal for a few hours, til it’s close to bedtime. But on this particular day, everybody was too dysregulated for that to even work, or be safe. We came home instead. The kids played … Read more
Bedtime has been rough for… Well, let me back up. Bedtime has been out of whack in general for like, six weeks now. But bedtime has been especially bad and full of tears and yelling and dysregulation this whole week. I’ve been so tapped out myself by the end of the day that I can … Read more
The sensory weight of disability. It’s the way it feels like I had barely learned how to take care of myself without self invalidation. It’s the way that all of my feel-good strategies involve making myself feel worse first, and immediately after. So what’s the point? It’s asking someone if they could hand me a … Read more
A weird component of running a page like this while my kids are 5 and 6, not grown, is that I’m still in the middle of this. It’s not theoretical and it’s not like I’m reflecting on years ago. Trying to find the balance between not oversharing about my personal life and my kids’ stories, … Read more
When something uncomfortable—like something for medical health and safety—has to happen for a child, it’s often adults’ instinct to try to do it as fast as possible, to get it over with. (After all, it would be kind of barbaric to extend an uncomfortable or painful experience when it could be sped up and then … Read more