When we introduce a new baby to the family, our kids might hear a lot of the following (from us, or from family members, or from well-meaning well-wishers): “You’re going to be such a good big brother/sister!” “Aren’t you so excited to be the big brother/sister?” “Isn’t it so fun having a new baby?” …etc, … Read more
This post has an audio and video recorded version for those who prefer to learn by hearing rather than by reading. Scroll to the bottom for the video of me reading it. Someone recently asked me, “I want my child to know that they can feel their full range of emotions without any emotion being … Read more
It can be really tricky to teach children how to understand the emotions inside of their bodies. It feels obvious after you already know all the emotion words — maybe, depending on how in tune you actually feel with your ability to interpret your own emotions! — but it’s much harder to do from the … Read more
It’s confusing to be a toddler. Toddlers often want to be “big kids” and be grown up (especially if they have older siblings)…but they may also really want to be “babies” and be taken care of (especially if they have younger siblings). They may go through long phases of wanting one or the other for … Read more
(At the time of my writing this, my son was 3 years old.) Yesterday evening was the best meltdown we’ve had in a long time. How’s that for a starter sentence? This is an incredibly long post, but I wanted to detail out exactly how this went and what I was thinking and doing, so … Read more
“Stop crying” was one of the most repeated things I heard in my childhood — definitely the most repeated “correction” I ever heard. I was constantly crying too much. And constantly in trouble for it. All parent/teacher conferences were like, “She’s doing great at x, y, and z…but she cries all the time…” The only … Read more
One of the most asked questions that I ever get—both in comment form, and in email form. I finally took the time to really write out a very long post answering it. Q: How can I help my child when they’re already at the crisis point—the point of melting down, hitting, kicking, throwing, etc? Assuming … Read more
On my Facebook page, I asked adults to share something that their child had been doing that was frustrating or upsetting to them. I then invited people in the comments (myself included) to respond, from the perspective of the child…what the child might be thinking or learning or trying or not-trying and how it’s getting … Read more
I shared a post about parents asking “How do I get my child to…” and trying to get away from that language, which isn’t helpful for understanding what is going on for the child that they *can’t* do whatever the expectation is. Someone in the comments wanted to know, “What about a situation like allowing … Read more
At home… “I want Dad.” “I know.” But Dad needed to take a break for a little while, so I’m going to play with you for right now. “I need a Band-Aid.” “I hear you, it hurts!” But a Band-Aid doesn’t actually do anything for your eyeball being itchy. “I want to go downstairs.” “Yeah, … Read more