Sometimes when my kids are playing, one of them plays too rough or in a different way than the other one wanted them to. Sometimes they will appeal to me for intervention: “I said stop and he’s not stopping!” More often, lately, though, the dynamics have been shifting. In their younger years, I would jump … Read more
Do you understand the difference between wishes, limits, and boundaries? If you find yourself saying the word “want” or “need”, a lot of times you are expressing a value, a wish, or a feeling. Same with the word “let”, as in “they won’t let me…” Limits are a decision that you are enforcing about the … Read more
(All I’m doing in this post is describing adult/child interactions that I observed, but I want to give you a heads up that it’s kind of infuriating. I think that’s important to share and to talk about, but I wanted to put this heads-up here because I know that some readers have been more intensely … Read more
Ten things I could’ve done when my kid didn’t want to brush her teeth… Nonverbal cue: Set the toothbrush down next to my kid. Toothpaste already loaded. Wordlessly. Offer alternatives: Mouthwash, floss, a different flavor of toothpaste… Playful: Announce that I see something silly in my kid’s mouth, and how I need to get it … Read more
People use the word “redirect” to mean a lot of things. Sometimes people are using it to talk about actions. Sometimes they are using it to talk about emotions. Sometimes they are using it to talk about energy levels. Sometimes people are using it to talk about distracting. Sometimes they are using it to actually … Read more
People of all ages sometimes seek out crying when they need it, because crying can be very healing and stress-relieving. Adults might put on a sad movie, listen to music that holds a lot of meaning for them, or look through old photos or keepsakes to make themselves cry. Some children might also seek out … Read more
Earlier this year, I bought my 5yo “Apollo” new shoes. Apollo’s approach to clothing has always been pretty much functional. He’s gotta wear clothing to go out in public so whatever goes on his body works just fine. He’s occasionally been enthusiastic about a cool airplane shirt or whatever but mostly unconcerned with what he’s … Read more
I spoke to a parent recently whose child was getting in trouble at school for being too “touchy” with other children—wanting to hug, touch, wrestle, tickle, etc more than was school-appropriate or allowed. I know these types of kids, too, and my heart really goes out to them! Rough-and-tumble play is a powerful and important … Read more
