If you are pursuing diagnosis for your neurodivergent child, it’s okay to take your neuro-affirming lens back “off” in order to talk to the doctor about your child. What I mean is that you are not a bad parent or you don’t love your child less if you play the system by its own rules. … Read more
Let me tell you a fable. Once upon a time, an expert doctor was studying a child who ran away from rooms that had air-conditioners in them. Air-conditioners had only recently been invented, and it took some doing to figure out exactly what the child was running away from, but without a doubt, if he … Read more
There are times in my life when I start feeling my own internal “defiance” increase—though I don’t usually call it by that word. I start feeling resistant to having to answer people about the decisions I’m making. I bristle against having to respond to demands. I start feeling “touched out” by my kids touching my … Read more
Autism, ADHD, and several other conditions — especially the type diagnosed often in childhood — are the same way. Emphasis on being the type that are diagnosed in childhood. Because when children are inconvenient, their adults tend to want an explanation why, as opposed to being able to patiently try to understand what’s going on … Read more